Showing posts with label guess. Show all posts
Showing posts with label guess. Show all posts

Saturday, 25 January 2014

Student Teacher ever best jokes



Chintu failed in Exam & decided to
make a deal
with professor.

Chintu: Sir, Can I ask u one que?
. Prof: Yes.
Chintu: If u can answer dis question, i
will
accept my final marks, if u cant, u
have to give me "A"

Professor agreed.
..
Chintu asked: "What is legal but not
logical,
logical but not legal & neither legal
nor logical?"
Prof thought about it for hrs & pondered no
answer.
.
He had to finally give up as he really
didnot
know.
.
He gave the boy his "A"

The following day, professor asked
same
question to his students
He was shocked when all of them
raised their
hands.
He asked one student.
He answered:
Sir, u are 65, married to 28 yrs old
woman, dis
is legal but not logical.
Ur wife, is having an affair with a 23
year old
boy, dis is logical but not legal
Ur wife's boyfriend has failed in his exam &yet u
have given him an "A", dis is neither
logical nor
legal.


Professor behosh....

Teacher: You copied from Fred's exam paper didn't you ?
Pupil: How did you know ?
Teacher: Fred's paper says "I don't know" and you have put "Me, neither"!

Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention here?
Student: yes mam, I am paying as little attention as i can. !!

Father to son: How did you write your exam?
.
Son: They had asked questions which I didn't know, so I wrote answer which they will not know



1st year students of M.B.B.S were attending their 1st practical class. 

They all gathered around the surgery table with a real dead dog.
The Professor put his finger in dog's ass & tasted it in his own mouth.
Then he told them to do the same...
The students hesitated for several Minutes,
but eventually everyone inserted their finger
in the dog's ass & tasted it. 

When everyone finished, the professor looked at them & said :
" The most important thing is " OBSERVATION "
I inserted my middle finger 
but tasted the index finger !


Now learn to " PAY ATTENTION "=))

Wednesday, 22 January 2014

Puzzle Messages and jokes.


k
k

LOOK 30 SEC ON X MARK INT THE EYE OF SKULL AND THEN LOOK AT THE WALL OF SHEET OF PAPER

COMMENT IF YOU FINDS A SKULL AND ALSO CHECK BY INCREASING DISTANCE



This puzzle is called Lateral Thinking.. Just Check It Out!

Scroll down slowly and be honest to yourself. Think like a wizard;
      man
1. ------------
     board


Ans. =man overboard

Okay, let's see if you've got the hang of it.

      stand
2. ------------
        i


Ans. = I understand

OK . .Got the drift ?Let's try a few now and see how you fare ?

3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/


Ans. = reading between the lines

      R
4. Road
      A
      D



Ans. = cross road

Not having a good day now, are you ?Redeem yourself.

5. cyclecyclecycle

Ans. = tricycle
Easy to figure out, ha!


          0
6._________
    M.D.Ph.D.




Ans. = two degrees below zero

C'mon give it a little thought ! !


      knee
7. ------------
      light




Ans. = neon light ( knee - on - light )

I'm sure you'll have no problem getting this one.

    ground
8. ----- ----------
feet feet feet feet feet feet




Ans. = six feet underground

Good One, try this!!

9. he's / himself




Ans. = he's by himself

Here's an easy one!!

10. ecnalg




Ans. = backward glance

Not even close ?!!?

11. death ..... life




Ans. = life after death

Okay last chance .

12. THINK





Ans. = think big ! !

And the last one is very funny- - -


13. Ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb..

.
Long time no C




What is black when you buy it,
Red when you are using it,
And grey when you throw it away?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Answer is : Charcoal


?A? ki Biwi ?B?,
?B? ki Bhabhi ?C?,
?C? ki beti ?V?,
?V? ka dada ?G?
?G? ki biwi ?K?,
?K? ki beti ?T?,
To batao ?A? or ?T? ka kya rishta ha ???

Answer= Husband nd Wife

Birthday Problem
1 aadami apani har birthday pe ek rupiya jama karata hai jab wo 60vi birthday pe khzana todata hai to us mai 15rupaye hoty hain..Q??
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
His birthday comes on 29 Feb.

Life SMS




hhh
Zindagi Main Kuch Khona Pade To Yeh Do Lines Yaad
Rakhna.....!!!!!
"Jo Khoya Hai Us Ka Ghum Nahi!
"Lekin Jo Paaya Hai Wo Kisi Sey Kam Nahi!
Jo Nahi Hai Wo Ek Khawab Hai
Aur
Jo Hai Wo Lajwab Hai........

Ek hi Zamaane k 2 mash-hoor Shaayro ka apna apna Andaaz dekhiye dosto....
Pehle Mirzaa Gaalib:
"Udne de in Parindo ko Azaad fiza main 'Galib'......Jo tere Apne
hongeh wo laut aayenge kisi Roz...!!!"
Shaayar Iqbal reply to Galib~~~
"Na Rakh Umeed-E-Wafa kisi Parinde se 'Iqbal'....
Jab par nikal aatey hain..., to Apne bhi Aashyana bhool jate hai....!!!"


A GOLDEN QUOTE BY RATAN TATA-
I dont believe in taking right decisions..
I take decisions & then make them right.
So always believe in ur ability & efforts..







Never try or beg for support from others..
Stand alone & face d life as a race..
Then everyone will follow u..

Cute, Life quotes, Saying-
Not all fingers r same in length..
But wen they r bend, all stands equal..
Life becomes easy wen we bend & adjust to situation

No one has ever won a game of chess by moving forward alone..
Sometimes u have to move backward to get a better step forward..

Smile increases value of face,
Anger spoils beauty of soul,
Faith is force of life,
Confidence is companion of success,
So keep smiling.

Time is like river..
You can’t touch the same water twice,because the flow that has passed will never pass again..
Enjoy every moment of life..

The best cosmetics in life:
TRUTH: for lips
SYMPATHY: for eyes
PRAYER: Voice
CHARITY: for hands
SMILE: for face &
LOVE: for heart

Somewhere I Heard..
Life is Beautiful..
But Very Soon I Released..
Lots of
Conditions Apply..!!



Someone asked A PHILOSOPHER that..
Who you want to be with for your entire life?
He simply said:
Someone who can understand that I am not perfect.

Life is so confusing..
What we want we dont get..
What we get we r not satisfied..
What we expect never happens and
What we hate generally repeats.
Thats life.

If u wait for happy moments,
u will wait forever.
But if u start believing that u r happy,
u will b happy forever.

Thats life.