Hello Pizza Hut!
Customer: Hello, can you please take my order?
Operator : Can I have your multi purpose Aadhar card number first, Sir?
Hold on..... My number is 889861356102049998-45-54610
Operator : OK... you're... Mr SYED and you're calling from 155, 1st
Cross. Panduranga Nagar, BG Road, Bangalore. . Your home number is
26490786, your office 22211379 and your mobile is 9880088786. You are
calling from you home number now.
Customer: (Astonished) How did you get all my phone numbers?
Operator : We are connected to the system, Sir.
Customer: I wish to order your Seafood Pizza...
Operator : That's not a good idea Sir.
Customer: How come?
Operator : According to your medical records, you have high blood
pressure and even higher cholesterol level, sir.
Customer: What?... What do you recommend then?
Operator : Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it.
Customer: How do you know for sure?
Operator : You borrowed a book titled 'Popular Hokkien Dishes' from
the National Library last week, sir.
Customer: OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then.
Operator : That should be enough for your family of 07. Sir. The
total is Rs. 2,450.
Customer: Can I pay by credit card?
Operator : I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card
is over the limit and you owe your bank Rs. 1,51,758 since October
last year. That's not including the late payment charges on your
housing loan, Sir.
Customer: I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw
some cash before your guy arrives.
Operator : You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've exhausted even
your overdraft limit.
Customer: Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready.
How long is it gonna take anyway?
Operator : About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always
come and collect it on your motorcycle.
Operator : According to the details in the system , you own a
motorcycle registration number 7786
Customer: "????" (hmmm.. these guys know my motorcyle number too!)
Operator : Is there anything else, sir?
Customer: Nothing.! .. by the way... aren't you giving me that 3 free
bottles of cola as advertised?
Operator : We normally would sir, but based on your records, you're
also diabetic... In the best interest of your health, we are holding
this offer for you.
Operator: Better mind your language sir. Remember on 10th July 1986
you were imprisoned for 3 days and fined Rs.5,000 for using abusive
language against a policeman...?
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