Tuesday, 4 February 2014

21 ways to understand a woman...(understanding woman is a myth)




1. All men unanimously: Silence gives grace to a woman.
2. One thing men can't understand about women is how women understand so much about men.
3. A wise man tells a woman he understands her. A stupid one tries to prove it.
4. The best way to change a woman's mind is to agree with her.
5. If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, then....talk in your sleep.
6. A woman worries about her future till she gets a husband. A man never worries about his future until he gets a wife.
7. Nobody teaches Volcanoes to erupt, Tsunamis to devastate, Hurricanes to sway around and no one teaches How to choose a
    Wife, NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN.
8. What is good, bad, worst: Good: Wife does not talk to you, bad: she wants a divorce, worst: she is a lawyer.
9. You know why women starts with 'W'...because all questions start with "W"!... and also Wife. What? "H" is left, then you are to
    ask yourself "Despite so many Ws, how come I chose to go ahead and proposed her to be my wife?"
10. God created woman only to tame man - Voltaire.
11. A man's wife has more power over him than the state has - Ralph Waldo Emerson.
12. The man who say wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him - Oscar Wilde.
13. When a woman is speaking to you, listen to what she says with her eyes - Victor Hugo.
14. The trouble with some woman is that they get excited about nothing, and then marry him - Cher
15. An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets, the more interested he is in her - Agatha Christie.
16. A good woman inspires a man; a brilliant woman interests him; a beautiful woman fascinates him; and a sympathetic woman
      gets him - Helen Rowland.
17. Cool message by a woman: Dear mother-in-law, "Don't teach me how to handle my children, I'm living with one of yours and he
      needs a lot of improvement"
18. A Sweet demand by a kid:  A kid was beaten by his mom. Dad came and asked - what happen son? Kid said-I can’t adjust with
      your wife anymore, I want my own.
19. When a married man says "I'll think about it, What he really means that,  He doesn't know his wife's opinion yet.
20. A Lady to Doctor: My husband has  habit of talking in sleep! what should I give him to cure?  Dr: Give him an Opportunity to
      speak when he is awake.

21. Two college friends met at a railway station after five years. One of them had married and the other remained single.
      The bachelor was curious to know about married life from his friend as he was thinking of getting married. "How are you getting
      along with your wife?" he asked.

      The married man replied: "Oh, it is very happy alliance. The secret of success is simple. I've the privilege to take major
      decisions and have relegated only minor decisions to my wife. It is working perfectly well at our level.:

      The bachelor was curious and enquired, "What are major and minor decisions/"

      The married man explained: "The minor decisions are what clothes are to be bought for family members, which school the
      children should be sent to, operation of bank account, gifts for some events,  etc. Major decisions are who should be the PM of
      India, what should be the strategy to make a strong claim for security council permanent membership in UN, should India test


      another nuclear bomb or what type of relationship should we maintain with China, etc."


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